Hey guys! Today, i really feel like sharing something with you all. I am an introvert and sometimes I even have difficulty interacting with people😅 On the contrary, I love to talk.I love my alone time as well, but not always. I just penned down what I felt and I hope u can connect to these lines.
Have you ever felt lonely? Not physically, but emotionally?
I have, because, for me solitude is not a physical state but an emotional one. Even among tons of people laughing away, i find myself engulfed in dark,dark excruciating silence of solitude. I feel a tremendous urge to let fall the tears which had already come to the verge. Suddenly, i want to vanish, my existence crumbled to dust, a part of the never ending process of degradation. I put out my hand, longing, with the innocent beating of my young heart that someone will hold it. Someone will want me to reappear and tell me it’s okay. I long for a person who will unveil the sheet of isolation, drag me out of this invisibility.
Do I really not exist?
They ignore me as if I don’t and I dive deeper and deeper to reach the unfathomable depths of solitude. It has intoxicated me with freedom. Now, i am addicted to loneliness. I embrace this isolation and live through it. Solitude doesn’t scare me now. I have learnt to love the darkness, the silence of non-existence. The freedom of unpretentious action fills me with bliss. I have learnt to support my own head on my shoulder and not cry for my empty hand. I have learnt to breathe normally for I am living. Ain’t I?
Yes, I am alive for this faint streak of hope in my heart peeps through the bullet holes. I hope for the end of my solitary confinement inside my own skin. I long to set free. But ,i don’t want to die. No.
I must live. I must embrace the nature for it is generous. I must travel the world and find my true happiness in the winding streets, bustling markets and overwhelming wonders of the world.
No, i don’t feel morbid. I feel exhausted of the chains around my ankles tied with people who never even ask me how I am doing.
I want to go out into the world. Someone would join me for sure. Someone, in this whole wide universe would care for me, be by my side in this journey of self exploration, someone who would never leave!
Thank you for being a part of this. 😊